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♪ in napoli ♪ where love is king ♪ when boy meets girl ♪ here's what they say ♪ when the moon hits your eye ♪ like a big pizza pie ♪ that's amore ♪ when the world seems to shine ♪ like you've had too much wine
♪ bells will ring ♪ ting-a-ling-a-ling, ting-a-ling-a-ling ♪ and you'll sing "vita bella" ♪ hearts will play ♪ tippy-tippy-tay, tippy-tippy-tay ♪ like a gay tarantella ♪ when the stars make you drool ♪ just a like pasta fazool ♪ when you dance down the street
♪ with a cloud at your feet ♪ you're in love ♪ when you walk in a dream ♪ but you know you're not dreaming, signore ♪ 'scusa me, but you see ♪ back in old napoli chorus: ♪ when the moon hits your eye ♪ lucky fella ♪ just like pasta fazool
♪ when you walk ♪ in a dream ♪ but you know ♪ you're not dreaming, signore ♪ that's amore ♪ woman 1: he looks great. woman 2: that al contiis a genius. (indistinct chattering) i am a genius.
i am a genius! if you'resuch a genius, how comeyou can't keep trackof your receipts? al, how am i supposedto do your income taxwith this mess you got here? numbers, taxes,receipts. i make them look betterthan they did in real life. i'm an artistic genius! then how comeyou got butteron your tie? oh!
(grunting) give it here. you know what?i give you this, you make good coffee. you're a slob,but you makegood coffee. red roses. hmm! very romantic. ah! ah, the guythat sends these really knowswhat he's doing.
the guywho sends thosespends a lot of money on something that couldend up in the garbage. i'm glad everybodyain't like you, loretta, i'd be out of business. what are you talking?i love flowers. thanks, carmine. you ready? hello, bobo.how are you tonight? hi.
very good, mr. johnny. we will both havethe ticino salad... si. ...and i'llhave special fish. good. no, you don't want the fish. no? no, it'soily fish tonight.not before the plane ride. well, maybe you're right.
okay, bobo. we'll havethe manicotti, bobo. si, miss loretta. that'll give you a basefor your stomach. you know, youeat that oily fish,you go up in the air, halfway to sicily,you'll be green. and your handswill be sweaty. you look after me. woman:would you justlet me say something?
i'm really boredwith this. i don't understand. don't ruinthe whole evening... now, patricia,please don't leave. just what do you thinki am, some sort oftalking dog? i wasjust making a pointabout the way you said, the way you statedyour aspirations. yeah, well, you can kiss myaspirations, professor!
"kiss my aspirations?"oh, very clever. yeah. yeah, the heightof cleverness. (man laughing) waiter. yes. would youdo away with her dinnerand any evidence of her, and bring mea big glass of vodka. absolutely.
a man who can'tcontrol his woman is funny. (laughing) she was too youngfor him. what's the matter,uncle bobo? tonight, mr. johnny isgonna propose marriage. how do you know that? he arranged it with me. when he asks,he's gonna wave,
and then i servethe champagne. (sighing) good bachelor customerfor 20 years. mille grazie. how's things, eh? fine, bobo.we'll have the check. there you go. no, no. i, uh... i want to seethe dessert cart.
very good. you never have dessert. well, neveris a long time. what's the matter with you? my scalpis not gettingenough blood sometimes. have some dessert. no, i shouldn't. will you marry me? what?
huh? bobo, take the cart away. very good,miss loretta. are you proposingmarriage to me? all right,you know i was marriedand that my husband died. but, what you don't know isi think he and i had bad luck. what do you mean? well, we got marrieddown at the city hall. i thinkit gave bad luckto the whole marriage.
right from the start,we didn't do itright, okay? could you kneel down? on the floor? yeah, on the floor. this is a good suit! i know that.i helped you pick it out. it came withtwo pairs of pants.johnny, it's for luck. i mean, a man proposesmarriage to a woman,he should kneel down. she's got him on his knees.he's ruining his suit.
is that man praying? so... where's the ring? the ring! a ring. that's right. i would'vesprung for the ringif it was me, capisce? you could useyour pinkie ring. i like this ring.
you propose marriageto a woman, you should offer hera ring of engagement. shh. loretta. loretta castorini clark, on my knees, in front ofall of these people, will you marry me? yes, johnny.
yes, john anthony cammareri,i will marry you. i will be your wife. bravo! bravissimo! salute, paisano! bobo! the check! right away, mr. johnny. what aboutthe wedding? my mother is dying. when she's dead, i'll comeback, and we'll get married.
how near death is she? a week.two weeks. no more. well, now, how about weset a date. how abouta month? must it be so definite? can't we just say we'llbe married when i get back? where?at the city hall? no! and i wanta whole wedding, orwe'll have bad luck. and for a whole weddingto be planned you gottaset a date. all right. all right.all right. a month.
a month from today. in a month. a month from today? yes, a month from today. okay, okay. okay, okay. all right. right today. i'll take care of it, johnny.i'll take care of thewhole thing. all you gotto do is show up.
man on pa: 700 departure for paris. please proceed to gate number 29. call me when you get in. i'll call you wheni get to mama's house. okay. you made me very happy. there's one thingabout this weddingi want you to do. i want you to call...i want you to callthis number. it's a business number. you ask for ronny.invite him tothe wedding.
okay. who is he? it's my younger brother. you got a brother? we haven't spokenin five years. there wassome bad blood. i want you to call himand invite him to thewedding. will you do it? sure. man on pa: international flight number 604 for rome
with connections to palermo is now boarding at gate 43. i got to go. you got your ticket? okay, here.i got you thesegum and cough drops. gum opens your earswhile you chew. okay, i gotta go. man on pa: this is the last call for international flight number 604 for rome now... you have someoneon that plane?
yeah, my fiance. i put a curseon that plane. my sisteris on that plane. i put a curseon that plane that it's going toexplode. burn on fireand fall into the sea. fifty years ago,she stole a manfrom me. (speaking italian) today she tells methat she never loved him,
that she took himto be strong on me. now she's going backto sicily. i cursed her. that thegreen atlantic watershould swallow her up! i don't believe in curses. neither do i. mr. johnny's, right? good night. the key's in it.
(music playing) woman: i've heardthat song before. what are youtalking about? i've seen the wayyou look at her,and it isn't right! how do i look at her?can i help you? a split of mumm's. so, how doi look at her? like a wolf. like a wolf, huh?
aha, like a wolf. you've never seena wolf in your life. that's $11.99. i seen the wolfin everybodyi ever met, and i see a wolfin you. mmm-hmm. that makes 20. thanks.have a nice night. you, too.
you know whati see in you? the girl i married. oh, come on. (woman singing on radio) ♪ let it please be him ♪ oh, dear god, it must be him ♪ it must be him ♪ or i shall die ♪ oh, hello, hello, my dear god... ♪ (barking)
hi, guys! ooh, sweethearts!how are you? how are you? guess what happenedto me today? ciao, bello. ciao. bueno notte. (dog barks) hey! hey! how long must i wait? come here.
hi, pop. oh, hi. where's ma? in bed. you're not sleepy? i can't sleep anymore.it's too much like death. pop, i got news. all right. let's go into the kitchen.
♪ i start to pray (humming along) ♪ let it please be him ♪ oh, dear god ♪ or else i shall die (cork popping) okay. ♪ hello, hello, my dear god ♪ it must be him ♪
ti amo. you look tired, pop. so what's your news? i'm getting married. again? you didthis one before,it didn't work out. but the guy died. and what killed him? he got hit by a bus.
no. bad luck. you're mother and i weremarried 52 years.nobody died. you were married, what,two years? somebody's dead. don't get married again,loretta, it don't workout for you. who's the man? johnny cammareri. john... johnny cammareri. he's a big baby. and why isn't he herewith you telling me this?
because he'sflying to sicily.his mother is dying. more bad luck. i don' t likehis face, loretta,don't like his lips. when he smiles,i can't see his teeth.what is he hiding? when you gonna do it? i won't come. you gotta come. you gotta give me away! i didn't give you awaythe first time.
and i had bad luck! you know, maybeif you gave me away, and if i got married ina church, in a wedding dress, instead of downat the city hall, with strangers standingoutside the door, then maybe,i wouldn't havehad the bad luck i had. maybe. you know, pop,i had no reception, no wedding cake,no nothing.
johnny got down on his kneesand proposed to me at thegrand ticino. he did? that don't sound like johnny. well... here. it looks stupid.it's a pinkie ring. it's a baby,it's a man's ring. it's temporary! everything is temporary!that don't excuse nothing.
you're coming? let's go tell your mother. rose. rose! who's dead? nobody.loretta's getting married. i don't like him. you're not gonnamarry him, cosmo. do you love him,loretta?
no. when you love them,they drive you crazybecause they know they can. but you like him? oh, yeah. you know,he's a sweet man, ma. and this time i'm gonnaget married in a churchand have a big reception. and who's gonnapay for that? pop. the fatherof the bride pays.
i have no money. you're richas roosevelt. you're just cheap, cosmo. i won't payfor nothing. you know, it's your dutyas my father to pay forthe wedding. cosmo: i won'tpay for nothing. he didn'tused to be cheap. he thinksif he holdsonto his money, he will never die.
♪ what's done is done now he's goingto play that damnvikki carr record, and when he comes to bed,he won't touch me. ♪ have a lot of fun ♪ it's easy when you play it cool ♪ boy 1: look at that old man. boy 2: i can't believehow many dogs he's got. (both laughing) boy 1: hey, keepyour dogs offmy lawn.
(boy 1 laughing) come on. (bell tolling) don't do that.she's asleep. old man: look allthe flowers on foncica. my brother sent hera blue flower. i can only seethings in my house. and things in my houseare very bad. i don't knowwhat to advise my son.
i think he shouldpay for the wedding. but it's important thathe don't look ridiculous. well, why don't youtalk to him? i will. but i must findthe right moment. see la bella lunalast night? ah, si. ah, si, la luna. la bella luna. the moon bringsthe woman to the man.
capisce? capisce. andiamo. (men chattering in italian) ciao. andiamo, andiamo. come va? bene, bene. upstairs.everybody upstairs.
bene, bene! come on. bendiamo. loretta: ciao, bello. old man: ciao, ciao. so, will you live here? why not? pop don't like johnny. hmm. we'll sell the house. i got married before,you didn't sell.
grandmawas still alive. chiro was still homegoing to school. now he's married,gone to florida. if you and johnny moved in,had a baby... ma, i'm 37 years old. what's 37?i didn't have chirotill after i was 37. it ain't overtill it's over. johnny's gota big apartment. you know,we'll move in there.
so we'll sell the house. you know what? i want to live here,i love the house. no, he don't. (telephone rings) i'll get it.i'll get it. (telephone ringing) hello? (woman speaking italian)
yeah, yeah.this is loretta castorini. johnny! johnny? johnny: operator? op, op... loretta? yeah! (shushing) it's me.
i'm calling from thedeathbed of my mother. yeah, well, how wasyour plane ride? the waitresseswere very nice. my motheris slipping away! how long do i have to wait? (praying in italian) i can't talk long. did you tell herwe're getting married? oh, no, no. not yet.
i'm waiting until a momentwhen she's peaceful. well, don't wait tillshe's dead. have you called my brother? no, i'm sorry. no.not yet. i forgot. will you do it today? yes. yes. make surehe comes to the wedding. five years is too long forbad blood between brothers. nothing can replacethe family, loretta.
i can see that now. loretta? loretta, are you there? loretta! okay, i'm sorry.i'll do it.i'll do it today. and, listen, johnny, you know,call me after you tell her,okay? all right. all right. and don't standdirectly underthe sun. you got a hat, use your hat. i got my hat. all right.all right. all right. bye.
all right. bye-bye. now what did ido with that card? how's the mother? she's dying.but i could stillhear her big mouth. (sobbing) (blows nose loudly) he didn't tell her! you know,the woman makes him crazy. now who are you calling?
(ringing) cammareri's. yeah, is ronny cammarerithere, please? hold on.ronny, the phone! ronny! yeah, this is ronny. i'm calling for your brother. and he's getting married.and he would like it ifyou would come. why didn't he call himself?
he's in palermo. what's wrong cannever be made right! look, let mejust come and talk... talk to you! animal! what an animal! thanks, mrs. fugocci.here you go. okay, bye.see you tomorrow. goodbye.
come on, honey. is ronny cammareri here? he's down at the ovens.what do you want? i want to talk to him. this way. ronny? man: what? somebody here to see ronny. ronny!
ronny, somebodywants to see you! have you comefrom my brother johnny? why? well, we're going toget married. you're going tomarry my brother johnny? yeah. would you like to gosomeplace where we could... i have no life. excuse me? my brother johnnytook my life from me.
i don't understand you. and nowhe's getting married. he has his. he's getting his, and he wants me to come. what is life? you know,i didn't comehere to upset you. they said bread is life. and i bake bread,bread, bread.
and i sweat, and shovelthis stinking dough in and out of thishot hole in the wall and i should be so happy. huh, sweetie? you want me tocome to the weddingof my brother johnny? where's my wedding? chrissy,over by the wall.bring me the big knife. chrissy: no, ronny! bring me the big knife.i'm going to cut my throat!
maybe i shouldcome back another time. no, i want you to see this.i want you to watch mekill myself so you can tellmy brother johnnyon his wedding day. okay? chrissy, bring me thebig knife! i tell you,i won't do it! she won't do it. do you know about me? oh, mr. cammareri...
uh-uh. nothing is anybody's fault,but things happen. look. this wood is fake. five years ago, i wasengaged to be married. and johnny came in hereand he ordered breadfrom me. i said,"oh, okay,some bread." and i put my handin the slicer,and it got caught, 'cause i wasn'tpaying attention.
the slicerchewed off my hand. and it's funny. 'cause when my fiancefound out about it, when she found outthat i'd been maimed,she left me for another man. that's the bad bloodbetween you and johnny? yes, that's it. yeah, but i...that's not johnny's fault. i don't care!i ain't no frickin'monument to justice! i lost my hand!i lost my bride!
johnny has his hand!johnny has his bride! you want meto take my heartbreak,put it away and forget? is it justa matter of time before a manopens his eyes and gives up his one dream? his one dream of happiness? chrissy: this isthe most tormentedman i have ever known. i'm in love with this man,but he doesn't know that.
'cause i never told himbecause he could neverlove anybody since he lost his handand his girl. where do you live? upstairs. can't we just talk? what are we painting here,the sistine chapel? (chuckling) we should'vebeen plumberslike castorini. (sighs)
(clicking tongue) well, mr. castorini,what do you think? $10,800. that seems like a lot. look, there arethree kinds of pipe. there's the kind of pipeyou have, which is garbage. and you can seewhat that's gotten you. then there's bronze.which is pretty good. unless something goes wrong.
and somethingalways goes wrong. and then, there's copper. which is the only pipe i use. it costs money. it costs moneybecause it saves money. i think we should followmr. castorini's advice, heart. and what did they say? well, the manunderstood me. the womanwanted to be cheap,
but the man sawit was right. you have sucha head for knowing.you know everything. i brought you something. it's a present. oh, cosmo! (gasping) oh, my god! they're little birdsand stars. birds flying to the stars,i guess, huh?
(aria playing from la boheme) what's that smell? i'm making you a steak. i don't want it. you'll eat it. i like it well-done. you'll eat this one bloodyto feed your blood. this is good. where did johnnyfind you?
he knew my husband,who died. how'd he die? a bus hit him. fast? instantaneous. when you get engaged? yesterday. so, five years agoyou got your hand cut off and your woman left you,no woman since then?
stupid. when did your husbandget hit by the bus? seven years ago. how many men since then? just johnny. stupid yourself. no, unlucky!i have not been lucky. i don't care about luck.you understand me? it ain't that.
what's the matterwith you? i mean, you thinkyou're the only onewho ever shed a tear? why are you talking to me? you got any whiskey?how about you give mea glass of whiskey? (vehicles honking) i'll call you later. (honking) (loretta sighing) she was right to leave me.
you think so? you really are stupid,you know that? you don't knownothing about it. look, you know,i was raised thata girl gets married young. i held out for love. i got marriedwhen i was 28. i met a man.i loved him,i married him. and then he wantedto have a babyright away
and i said no,that we should wait. and thenhe gets hit by a bus! so what do i got? i gotno man, no baby, no nothing. you know, howdid i know that that manwas a gift i couldn't keep? my one chance of happiness. you tell me this storyand you act likeyou know what it means. but i can see what thetrue story is andyou can't. that woman didn'tleave you, okay? you can't see what you areand i see everything.you're a wolf.
i'm a wolf? (stuttering)the big part ofyou has no words and it's a wolf. you know,the woman wasa trap for you. she caught you andyou couldn't get away so you chewed offyour own foot. that wasthe price you hadto pay for your freedom. you know, johnnyhad nothing todo with it. you didwhat you had to dobetween you and you.
(scoffing) and now, now you're afraid becauseyou know the big partof you is a wolfthat has the courageto bite off its own hand to save itself fromthe trap of thewrong love. that's whythere's been no womansince that wrong woman. you're scared to deathof what the wolf will do if you try andmake that mistake again. what are you doing?
i'm telling you your life. stop it! no! why are you marryingjohnny, he's a fool! because i have no luck. he made melook the wrong way,and i cut off my hand. he could make youlook the wrong way. you could loseyour whole head! i'm lookingwhere i have toto become a bride.
a bride without a head. a wolf without a foot! wait a minute!wait a minute! (moaning) son of a bitch! where are you taking me? to the bed. oh, god!okay, i don't care!i don't care! take me!take me to the bed.
i don't careabout anything. i don't believethis is happening. i was dead. me, too. what about johnny? you're mad at him. take it out on me.take your revengeout on me! leave nothing leftfor him to marry, leave nothing butthe skin over my bones!
there will be nothing left! (both moaning) rose: come on,let's eatwhile it's hot. cosmo: where's loretta, huh?we're going to eatwithout her? well, she must beeating out. she sure don't knowwhat she's missing. it's not like hernot to call. well, she's gota lot on her mind. we can talk about it,right, rose?
i mean everybody knowsshe's getting married again. i don't wantto talk about it. johnny cammareri. i thinkit's a great idea andabout time. what's she going to dowith the rest of her life,if she don't get married? cosmo:i don't wantto talk about it! my fatherneeds another plate. raymond: cosmo. many years agowhen they told me you were marryingmy sister, i was happy.
when i told rose that i wasmarrying rita, she was happy. well, marriage ishappy news, right? (all chuckling) rose, pass the wine. raymond: i've never seenanybody so in lovelike cosmo was back then. he'd stand outside the houseall day looking inthe windows. i never told you this'cause it's notreally a story. one time i woke up inthe middle of the night 'cause of this bright lightin my face, like a flashlight,
i couldn't think ofwhat it was. i looked out the window, and it was the moon, as big as a house. i never seen the moonso big before or since. i was almost scared, like itwas going to crush the house. and theni looked down, and standing there,in the street, was cosmo looking upat the windows.
(laughing)this is the funny part. i got mad at you, cosmo. i thoughtyou had brought thatbig moon over to my house, because youwere so in loveand woke me up with it. i was half asleep, i guess.i didn't know anything. you were altogether asleep.you were dreaming. you were there. well, what do youwant to talk about? why are you drinkingso much?
(dog whimpers) old man,you give those dogsanother piece of my food, i'm going to kick youtill you're dead! cosmo? you drank too much. now you'll sleeptoo hard, and later you'll be upwhen you should be down. ronny: what's the matter? nothing.i'm looking at the moon.
it's perfect. i never seena moon like that before. it makes youlook like an angel. it looks likea giant snowball. rita. rita, dear. wake up. oh. hmm.
it's cosmo's moon. cosmo can'town the moon. it's that mooni was talking about. at dinner. is he down there? is who down there? cosmo. well, what wouldhe be doing down there? i don't know.
you know something? in that light, with that expressionon your face, you look about 25 years old. what do you want? get out! get out! why do you make me wait? come on! come on, eh! howl! howl!
(howling) (dogs barking) howl! la luna. what! take it easy. this time,i was trying todo everything right. don't justbecome excited. i thoughtif i stayed awayfrom the city hall,
i wouldn't have thebad luck i've had again. you're making mefeel guilty. i'm marryingyour brother! all right,i'm guilty, i confess. the wedding'sin a couple of weeks.you're invited, okay? how come you didn't be likehim and be with your motherin palermo? she don't like me. you don't get alongwith anybody, do you? what did you do?
what did i do? you've ruined my life. that's impossible! it was ruinedwhen i got here. you ruined my life! no, i didn't. oh, yes, you did!oh, yes, you did! you know, you got thembad eyes like a gypsy. and i don't know whyi didn't see it yesterday.
bad luck! that's it! is that alli'm ever going to have? i should have taken a rockand killed myself years ago. i'm going to marry him.do you hear me? last night never happenedand i'm going to marry him. and you and iare going to takethis to our coffins. i can't do that. i'm in love with you. snap out of it!
i can't. all right, well then,i must never see you again, and the bad blood willjust have to stay there between youand johnny forever. and you won't cometo the wedding. i'll come to the wedding. i'm telling you,you can't come! he wants me to come. that's becausehe don't know, okay?
now, wait a minute.honey! listen, all right. i won't cometo the weddingprovided one thing. that you come with metonight to the opera. what are you talking about? i love two things, i love youand i love the opera. now, if i can have thetwo things that i lovetogether for one night, i would be satisfiedto give up... oh, christ!
to give upthe rest of my life. all right, all right. all right! meet me at the met. where's the met? well, you got to... bless me, father,for i have sinned. it's been two monthssince my last confession. what sinshave you to confess?
twice i took the nameof the lord in vain, once i slept withthe brother of my fiance, and oncei bounced a checkat the liquor store, but that wasreally an accident. then it's not a sin. but, what was that secondthing you said, loretta? you mean the oneabout once i slept withthe brother of my fiance? that's a pretty big sin.
i know. you shouldthink about this. all right.for your penance,say two rosaries. be careful, loretta. reflect on your life. (praying in latin) amen. where you been? just like your father.
i lied to him. he thinks you came homelast night. thanks. cosmo's cheating on me. what?how do you know this? a wife knows. you don't even know.you're just imagining it. he's too old. i won't be home for dinner.
(scatting) i feel great! i got no sleep, buti feel like orlando furioso. you were a tiger last night. and you were a lamb. as soft as... ...milk. (shushing)lower your voice.they'll hear you. so what?
the pleasureof marriage is,you sleep with the woman, you don'tworry about nothing! quiet, raymond! hey, how about a datetonight, rita, huh? what's the matterwith you? shut up! oh! we'll eat some pasta. please! we'll fool around a little. what's gotten into you?
i don't know.i really don't know. that moon,that crazy mooncosmo sent over. hi, aunt rita.hi, uncle raymond. hey there! ♪ you with the stars in your eyes ♪ what's the matter with him? you got me. raymond: see that moonlast night? (stuttering) what moon?
did you see it? listen, i got to go, okay?i'll take the depositto the bank, but theni got to come backtomorrow and do the books. well, sure.you got a date? what are you talking about,you fool! her fiance's in palermo!date! what date? oh, right. i just gota lot of things to do. yeah, you got allthat wedding stuff, huh?
hey, that's romantic, too! ♪ isn't it romantic? ♪ hey, frankie!make me a bowl of minestrone. (women laughing) what's the matter with you?you look crazy. i got a lot on my mind. i got a lot on... what? don't tell meyou got a lot onyour mind! i don't want totalk about it, okay?
loretta: take out the gray. i have been wanting todo this for three years! listen, let me show yousome magazines, huh? and you're going toneed a manicure, yes. all right,you take her, batina. she's gonnatake out the gray. oh, yeah, your eyebrows. someone's gonna haveto do your eyebrows. what are you... wait.
something very nice. wait a minute! has anybody hereever been to the opera? woman: not me. (woman chuckling) bellissima without those ugly grays. woman 1:oh, it is fantastic. you ever beento the opera? no, have you?
ow! no. batina, you everbeen to the opera? ooh! woman: la traviata? la boheme? loretta: i never been there. woman: you going to the met? (women chattering) woman 2: ...she came in.and when she turned 40and her husband left her. bye-bye.
okay, okay. okay. (man whistles) wow! look at that. oh! careful! hi. i'm home! don't everybodyanswer at the same time. hello! (switches on radio)
(tuning) (instrumental music playing) you look beautiful. your hair. yeah, i had it done. you look, uh,beautiful, too. thank you. i said i'd go tothe opera with you,but that's all. come on, let's go in.
good evening. there's your stubs. oh, look at that. it's something,isn't it? for what? for your hair. for your beautiful dress. i don't know,it's been a long timesince i've been to the opera. so, where arewe sitting?
(inaudible) (all applauding) here we go. (orchestra playing) so, who's coming? just me,i want to eat. okay, i got a tablefor you right now. this all right? fine.
enjoy your meal,mrs. castorini. signora castorini, you're dining alone tonight? hello, bobo, yeah.let me have a martini,no ice, two olives. ah, very good! sheila: i'm tryingto explain to youhow i feel. every timei tell you how i feel,you tell me how you feel. that doesn't seem likemuch of a response to me. well, it's the onlyresponse i've got. bobo: signora, you wantsomething to eat?
not now, i'll wait. sheila: i really hate itwhen you use that tonewith me, like you're above it alland isn't it so amusing. but it is,isn't it? not to me! this is my life, no matterhow comical it may seemto you. i don't needsome man standingabove the struggle while i'm rollingaround in the mud. well, i think you like toroll around in the mudand i don't.
that's fair, isn't it?now why... (people gasping) (people laughing) sorry about that, folks.she's a very prettymental patient. (all laughing) no, don't.no, no, no, no.please, don't mind me. just do me a favorand clear her place. get rid of allevidence of her, i'm sorryif we disturbed you.
i'm not disturbed by you. my lady friend hasa personality disorder. she's just too young for you. ah, thanks, comrade. waiter: it's nothing. too young? i just got that. you knowhow to hurt a guy, don't you? how old are you? none of your business.
i'm sorry,that was rude. would you like tojoin me for dinner? are you sure? i'd be delighted. i hate to eat alone.it's amazing how ofteni end up doing just that. signora castorini. your minestrone. oh, thanks, bobo. prego.
what do you do? i'm a professor. i teachcommunication, nyu. that woman wasa student of yours? sheila?yeah, she was. is. was. old sayingmy mother told me,you wanna hear it? don't shit where you eat. ha! okay,i'll remember that.
i'm a housewife. how comeyou're eating alone? i'm not eating alone. may i ask you a question? yeah, go ahead. why do men chase women? nerves. i thinkit's becausethey fear death. well, maybe.
listen, you want to knowwhy i chase women? i find women charming. i teach theseclasses i taughtfor a million years. the spontaneity wentout of it for mea long time ago. you know, it started outi was excited about something,i wanted to share it. now it's rote. multiplication table. except, sometimes... sometimesi'll be droning along,
and i'll look upand i see a fresh, beautiful young face, and it's all new to her. and i'm just this great guywho's brilliant and thinksout loud. and when that happens,when i look out thereamong those chairs and see a young woman's face, i see me in her eyes.me, the way i alwayswanted to be. maybe once was. i ask her out for a date.
it doesn't last long. a few weeks, a couple ofprecious months, then she catcheson that i'm just thisburned-out old gasbag, and she's asfresh and bright and full of promiseas moonlight ina martini. and at that moment,she stands up and throwsa glass of water in my face, or some actionto that effect. (perry chuckles)
what you don't knowabout women is a lot. well, that's not what i hear. (chuckles) two white wines. yes, sir. yes, i'd like twoglasses of champagne. canadian club and ginger ale,and dubonnet on the rocks,please. loretta: what's that? ronny: this wasdone by marc chagall.
and as you can see,he was a verygreat artist. it's kind of gaudy. well, he washaving some fun. they get some turnoutfor this stuff, huh? it's the best thingthere is. yeah, well, you know,i like parts of it, buti just don't really get it. you haven't once saidyou like my dress. i like your dress. it's very bright.
uh-huh. will you hold this? may i walkwith you a ways? you live far from here? just up there. (old man speaking italian) (cat meows) (gasps) (dogs whimper)
you knew that man? (classical music playing) (singing in italian) (man singing in italian) loretta:that was so awful. awful? beautiful, sad. she died. i couldn't believe it.you know, i didn't thinkshe was gonna die.
i knew she was sick,but... she had tb. i know. i mean,she was coughingher brains out, right? and stillshe had to keep singing. where should we go now? pop? pop, what areyou doing here? wait for meby the doors, mona. mona?
excuse me. what'd you doto your hair? i had it done. what areyou doing here? what are you doing here? who's that guy?you're engaged. and you're married. you're my daughter. i won'thave you act like a puttana. and you're my father.
i didn't see you here. i don't know ifi saw you here or what. let's get out of here.i'll buy you a drink. that woman wasnot my mother, okay? that's my house. you meanthe whole house? my god,it's a mansion! it's a house. i live ina one-bedroom apartment.
what exactlydoes your husband do? he's a plumber. well, that explains it. temperature's dropping. i guessyou can't invite me in. people home. no, i thinkthe house is empty. i can't invite you inbecause i'm married, because i know who i am.
you're shivering. i'm a little cold. you're a little boy,and you like to be bad. (whispering) we could goto my apartment. you could seehow the other half lives. i'm too old for you. i'm too old for me.that's my predicament. can i kiss youon the cheek, too? i'm freezing.
(jazz music playing) al: anything else, folks? i think that's it, al. carmine: see you, al. see you, carmine. what do youwant to do now? i want to go home. good night, al. take it easy, ronny.
god, it's cold. it smellslike snow. you know, my motherguessed that my fatherwas seeing somebody. that mona, i mean,she's some pieceof cheap goods. who am i to talk? what's the matter? how can you ask me that? you're making mefeel guilty again. you are guilty,i'm guilty.
of what? only god can pointthe finger, loretta. yeah, well,i know what i know. and what do you know? okay, you tell me my life,i'll tell you yours. i'm a wolf.you run to the wolf in me.that don't make you no lamb. you're gonnamarry my brother. (scoffs) why you want tosell your life short?
playing it safe's just aboutthe most dangerous thinga woman like you could do. i mean, you waitedfor the right manthe first time. why didn't you waitfor the right man again? because he didn't come. i'm here! you're late. this is your place. so this iswhere we were going. you know, we had a deal.
you told meif i came with youto the opera, then... then you'd leaveme alone forever. and i came with you. now, i'm gonnamarry your brother, and you're gonna leaveme alone forever, right? a person can see wherethey've messed up intheir life, and they can changethe way they do things. and they can evenchange their luck. so, maybe my naturedoes draw me to you,
that don't meani have to go with it. i can take hold of myselfand i can say yes tosome things and no to other things thatare gonna ruin everything.i can do that. otherwise,you know what? what good is this stupidlife that god gave us?i mean, for what? are you listening to me? everything seems likenothing to me now againstthat i want you in my bed. i don't careif i burn in hell. i don't careif you burn in hell.
the pastand the futureis a joke to me now. i seethat they're nothing.i see they ain't here. the only thing that's here is you and me. i'm gonna go home. i'm freezing to death. come upstairs.i don't care why you come. no, that's not what i mean.
loretta, i love you. not likethey told you love is. and i didn'tknow this either, but love don'tmake things nice. it ruins everything. it breaks your heart. it makes things a mess.we aren't here to makethings perfect. the snowflakesare perfect.
the stars are perfect. not us, not us. we are here toruin ourselves, and... and to break our hearts andlove the wrong peopleand... and die! i mean, the storybooksare bullshit! now, i want you to comeupstairs with me and...and get in my bed! (airplane engine roaring) 19 cranberry street,brooklyn. got it.
johnny: hold it! (tires screeching) how much? $25. $25? hold it. (tires screech) (doorbell buzzes) (it must be him playing on radio)
oh, hi. hi, i'm sorryto call so late. moving in? oh, no, i came rightfrom the airport. come on in. ♪ as i grab the phone, i pray look, can youwake up loretta?i need to talk her. she's not home yet.take off your coat andcome in the living room. i'll make you a drink. i want to talk to you.
♪ or i shall die ♪ oh, thank you.where is she? out.i don't know where. (music stops) so, what areyou doing here? you're supposedto be in palermo. that's what i cameto tell loretta. there's been a miracle. a miracle.well, that's news.
my mother's recovered! you're kidding. no, no. the breath had almosttotally left her body. she was as white as snow. and then,she completelypulled back from death, and stood up and put on her clothes and began to cook foreveryone in the house.
the mourners and meand herself. she ate a mealthat could choke a pig. (door opening) that's incredible. (door closes) (exclaims in disgust) oh, my god. is he all right? my father-in-law's gotthis wrong idea in his head.
listen, johnny, there's a questioni want to ask. i want you to tell methe truth, if you can. well, uh... there's the bible story. god... god took a rib from adamand made eve. now, maybe men chase womento get the rib back. when god took the rib,
he left a big hole there, a place where thereused to be something,and the women have that. now, maybe, just maybe, a manisn't complete asa man without a woman. why would a man needmore than one woman? maybe becausehe fears death. that's it. that's the reason.
i don't know! no! that's it! no, thank you. thank you foranswering my question. hello, mr. castorini. i don't know, rose. i don't know where i've been,and i don't know wherei'm going, all right? you should have youreyes open here, my friend. i have my eyes open.
oh, yeah?well, stick around.don't go on any long trips. i don't knowwhat you mean. i know you don't.that's the point.i'll say no more. you haven'tsaid anything! and that's all i'm saying. i justwant you to know,no matter what you do, you're gonna die,just like everybody else. thank you, rose. you're welcome.
i'm going to bed now. i'm going. cosmo: good. he doesn't like you, but thank youfor answeringmy question. you don't knowwhere loretta is? no, no idea. mrs. castorini,will you tell loretta thati'll come by in the morning? we... we need to talk.
okay, i'll tell her. okay. thank you. watch it, the house. (la boheme playing) (increasing volume) what the hellhappened to you? i really don't knowwhere to start. your hair's different. ma, everything is different.
are you drunk? no, are you drunk? no, but i have a hangover. where's pop? johnny cammarerishowed up last night. he's in sicily. no more he's not. but he's with hisdying mother in sicily. she recovered.
she was dying! it was a miracle. a miracle? this is modern times,there ain't supposedto be miracles no more! ah, i guess it ain'tmodern times in sicily. he cameright from the airport.he wanted to talk to you. you got a love biteon your neck! he's comingback this morning!what's the matter with you? your life's going downthe toilet!
cover up that damn thing!come on, put some makeupon it! all right, all right! okay, fine,but you got to help me! hurry up! what... you get it. answer the door! mother! mmm-mmm. hi, is loretta home?
(groans) it's not johnny! is johnny here? no, but he's coming. good. we can getthis out on the table. hi. i'm ronny,johnny's brother. i'm rose castorini. it's nice to meet you. you got a love biteon your neck.
your mother'srecovered from death. oh, good. we're not close, i'm notreally moved, but... you got toget out of here. i'm here tomeet the family. no, really, you gotto get out of here. anyone wantsome oatmeal? no, ma. yes, mrs. castorini,
i would love some oatmeal. no, we don'twant any oatmeal! rose: take your plate.sit down. ma, what... that was...this is... oh, ma! thanks, ma. loretta: hi. rose: cosmo,this is ronny,johnny's brother. it's very good to meet you,mr. castorini. i have a feeling this isgoing to be just delicious.
you're johnny's brother? don't look at melike that, okay? (old man coughing) rose: hi, pop! (greeting in italian) what's the matter, pop? i am old. the old are not wanted. and if they say it,they have no weight.
but, my son,i must speak. you mustpay for the weddingof your only daughter. you break your housethrough pride. there. i... i've said it. okay, pop. if she gets married,i'll pay for thewhole thing. old man: bravo, bravo. bravo.now you're talking. bravo.
bravo! let's eat. have i beena good wife? i want you tostop seeing her. and go to confession. a manunderstands one day thathis life is built on nothing. and that's a bad, crazy day. your life is notbuilt on nothing. it's johnny. i'll get it.
i'll get it. loretta: no, i'll get it. i think that ishould tell him. i'll tell him. what am i gonna tell him? tell him the truth,loretta. they find out anyway. you're right, papa. oh, papa.
rita: hi, loretta. hi, loretta. why aren't you twoat the store? do you have somethingyou want to tell us, honey? we just comefrom the bank. oh, my god, the bank!i forgot to make thedeposit! rita: oh, she's got it! i knew she had it! we didn'tknow what to think.you were so weird yesterday.
i know, i'm sorry. and then we went to the bank this morning, and no bag. we never suspected you. rose: listen, wouldanyone like some coffee? yes, coffee, coffee. that's a good idea. oh, my god,i'm telling you... what's with this...this bank?
i'll tell you later.i forgot to maketheir deposit. here, sit down.have some coffee. so, whatare we doing? waiting forjohnny cammareri. my name's ronny. johnny's brother. oh, nice to meet you.i'm rita cappomaggi. raymond cappomaggi,rose's brother. someone tell a joke.
(doorbell buzzing) i thoughtjohnny was in palermo. it's johnny cammareri. (inhales deeply) have you cometo make peacewith me? but you may not want to. oh, ronny,of course i want to. but, johnny, i mean,your mother was dying.how did she recover?
i told my motherwe were to be married,and she got well right away. i'm sure she did. oh, that's wonderful. yeah, yeah. johnny, i...i have somethingthat i have to tell you. and i have somethingto tell you. but i musttalk to you alone. no, i... i need myfamily around me now. i can't marry you.
if i marry you,my mother will die. what the hell areyou talking about?we're engaged! loretta, what areyou talking about? i'm talking abouta promise, okay?he proposed! because mymother was dyingand now she's not! oh, johnny,you're 42 years old. she's stillrunning your life. and you're a son whodoesn't love his mother! you are a big liar, okay,because i have a ringright here!
oh, i must ask for that back. (stammering)you know, all right,the engagement is off! in time,you will see thatthis is the best thing. in time, you'lldrop dead and i'll come toyour funeral in a red dress! ronny: loretta? johnny, can i borrow that ring? loretta castorini, yes, ronny, in front of allthese people, i'll marry you.
rose: do you love him,loretta? ma, i love him awful. oh, god,that's too bad. she loves me. i'm confused. (champagne cork pops) cosmo: hey, nice andeasy there. that's beautiful! rose: what happens isyou get so much carbon
and then you don't getany bubbles. cosmo:all right, listen up!to loretta and ronny! may you be lucky... (all chattering) lucky sure. all right, rosie.come on. here we are. thank you,thank you. come on.there we are. all right, darling.come on, raymond!
come, come. your brother is hereand you're... no, no, i don'twant any. i don't... you're the partof the family.don't you realize? come on, bere. no. it's the lucky one! plus, it's from naples. everybody, come on,glass in hand. (toasting in italian)
(all toasting in italian) to family! all: to family! to ronny and loretta! rose: to ronny and loretta! (cosmo toasting in italian) ♪ when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie ♪ and you'll sing, "vita bella" ♪ when you walk in a dream
♪ but you know you're not dreaming, signore ♪ 'scusa me, but you see, back in old napoli chorus: ♪ when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie ♪ ting-a-ling-a-ling ♪ vita bella, vita bella ♪ amore
